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At work today, I needed to translate an instruction manual from English to Spanish. Fun! My boss came over to my desk and looked at it. "Me Habla Spanish," he said and winked at me. No, sir, you don't habla. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/14/24 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (13) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( english spanish translate )

At work today, my boss announced he was establishing a company gym membership plan. At first, I was really excited. Then I saw the gym. It was an exclusive boxing training area. My boss boxes. Nobody else does. It's great for him, I guess. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/13/24 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (13) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( gym boxing training )

At work today, we installed a new security camera system in the building. It looks like we needed it. We didn't catch any criminals or anything like that. But we did see the CEO hooking up with a prostitute in the parking lot. I'm dumbemployed.

by oakenthrone on 03/16/24 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (11) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( security camera ceo prostitute )

At work today, I think my boss finally realized that morale is pretty low because of the recession. He could change our policies, our pay, or our approach to team building. Instead, he decided to buy us candy for one day. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/18/24 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (11) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( morale candy team )

At work today, one of our biggest readers requested a used book we didn't have. Still, I was impressed by his taste and promised to get it for him. The next guy in line wasn't so good. He wanted to get a "first edition" of the daVinci Code. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/14/24 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (11) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( reader books davinci )

At work today, I had a skinny waif come in to our hot dog stand. She asked for a real Chicago style hot dog. Then she proceeded to ask that there be no mustard, relish, lettuce, tomatoes, or bun. I'm dumbemployed.

by hagu_murakami on 03/14/24 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (11) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( skinny hot dog chicago )

At work today, this really posh looking guy came into our free clinic. We didn't know what he was doing there. He had pink eye. Turns out he was too embarrassed to show his regular doctor. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/13/24 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (10) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( free clinic pink eye posh )

At work today, a customer lost her wedding ring while she was sampling furniture in our store. We searched for hours to try and find it. We never did, but tried hard. Guess who is suing the store? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/16/24 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (10) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( wedding ring furniture lawsuit )

At work today, we discovered some interesting documents in the trash. Notes between secretaries about how they were looking for new jobs. Apparently, they don't think they'll keep their current ones. The problem is that I'm their boss. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/13/24 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( notes trash secretary )

At work today, I was a little hesitant about leaving early, but everyone insisted that it was totally fine. I cut out ten minutes early. Thirty minutes after that, I received a text message. Apparently, my supervisor thought that I had suddenly quit. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/16/24 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( leaving quit supervisor )

At work today, our boss announced that he wanted to start a work book club. OK, whatever- it's worth a try. Then we found out the first selection. Sir, Dr. Seuss is not appropriate for adults. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/16/24 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( book club selection dr. seuss )

At work today, I was tasked with rewriting the employee guidebook on etiquette. It was an OK project, and a little interesting to try and make up the rules. Plus, the entire time, my cubicle mate was looking at online dating sites. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/15/24 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( online dating etiquette handbook )
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