Register | About | RSS RSS | Login

Bosses

At work today, I got a phone call. I telecommute, but I didn't recognize the number. I picked up and shouted "I don't need no telemarketing scumbags!" Someone breathed on the line. "Jenny," my boss said. "It's Tony. I'm calling from my cell phone." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/21/19 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( teleconference teleconference cell phones )

At work today, my boss actually quit his job. He made a big scene. At first we were all scared. Then he yelled "And I'm taking my team with me!" We all stared at our computer screens until he was escorted out the building. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/20/19 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( quitting computer building )

At work today, my boss brought along Oreos. The first problem? No milk. The second problem? He likes to smile a lot. I stared at his crumb filled teeth the entire day. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/19/19 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (12) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( oreos teeth smiling )

At work today, I was sorting through shirts donated to our resale store. My boss came up to me with a frown. "Hey, this shirt is too damaged to sell. The sleeve is too short." Of course, his own shirt had two spaghetti stains, a missing button, and no collar. I'm dumbemployed.

by im_willow2004 on 02/18/19 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( shirts stains rips )

At work today, I found out I was being reassigned to a new department. As a result, I get a new boss. He introduced himself to me as "Crazy Gary." Later that day I called him Gary. He frowned. "My name," he shouted, "is Crazy Gary." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/17/19 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( crazy department awkward )

At work today, I was tasked with picking up my boss's coffee. She asked to have Raw Sugar, cream packets, Splenda, Sweet & Low, and half and half brought with it. I showed up exhausted with a whole cart of stuff. She took the coffee and just drank it black. I'm dumbemployed.

by walk_in_memphis on 02/14/19 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( coffee sugar splenda )

At work today, my boss came to my desk and told me to clear off all my stuff. I thought I was fired and started crying. "Don't worry," he said. "We're just moving you across the hall." I was relieved and told him I thought I'd been fired. "No," he said. "It's just a demotion." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/13/19 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( crying moving demotion )

At work today, my boss told me I was the best personal assistant he'd ever had. I was so proud. Then he smiled and told me I needed to take a pay cut, due to the economy. We were driving in his Mercedes. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/12/19 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( personal assistant pay cut mercedes )

At work today, I was given the keys to the back room. Well, I lost them.  Later, my boss asked me where they were. “I never got them,” I said. He crossed his arms. “I lost them, didn’t I?”  He started crying. I gave him a hug and pressed my face in his shoulder to hide my smile. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/12/19 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( keys lost hug )

At work today, I asked my boss if I could combine two fifteen minute breaks into one thirty minute break. She asked why, and I told her that I wanted to call my son, who was at home sick. "Sorry," she said. "We can only combine breaks for important stuff." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/11/19 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( breaks son sick )

At work today, I got to my desk and saw a picture of my boss lying next to my mousepad. He started walking by a minute later. "What's this?" I asked him. He smiled, perfectly matching with the grin in the picture. "It's inspiration," he said. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/09/19 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( mousepad picture inspiration )

At work today, my boss declared that we could all start “summer hours” with half a day off on Friday. Then he got a memo from corporate that he wasn’t allowed. His consolation was letting us wear shorts inside. Once. If we asked for permission. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/08/19 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( summer corporate permission )
Username:

Password:

Remember: