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At work today, I had a devilish idea to sneak into the supply closet and take a nap on the extra cot we have. I tip toed over the carpet and was very careful before I opened the door. And then I woke up the person who was already sleeping inside. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/22/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( cot nap devilish )

At work today, I continued my life sentence directly underneath the air conditioner. Being cool is cruel. Now I have to literally bring a sweater with me to work every day. The weather outside today? Over 93 degrees. I have on a cardigan. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/22/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( cardigan air conditioners cold )

At work today, everyone was speaking with a British accent. Apparently, they missed talk like a pirate day and wanted to do something new. I found the accents terrible. But I wish I'd been invited to do them too. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/22/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( british pirates uninvited )

At work today, they had me "tagging" all the photos on the corporate website. Everything's supposed to be appropriate and also true. So does that mean that I honestly tag the photo of Jeanine the secretary as "blazing drunk at the holiday party"? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/22/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( tags photos drunk )

At work today, I was given a very interesting assignment. My boss is giving a speech to industry big wigs and wants ten "totally unknown" factoids about the business. I work in water pipe maintenance. And the factoids have to be interesting. This could take a while. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/21/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( water maintenance factoids speech )

At work today, first blood was drawn in the corporate volleyball tournament. We won. But tomorrow we're playing against the Heglin twins. They're over six feet tall. And Swedish. I spent all day today studying volleyball strategy. I'm dumbemployed.

by bastet_mau on 09/21/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( twins swedish volleyball )

At work today, I spoke to an efficiency expert who wants to hack my employees away, unless I can find a way to justify each of them. The kicker? He wants a page about each one. I have fifty people working under me and a lot of work to do. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/21/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( efficiency layoffs summary )

At work today, I finally finished outlining the presentation I was going to make to our board. Then I noticed a lonely little line hidden at the bottom of the assignment email. They want Powerpoint too. Now I'm stuck all night learning how to use it. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/21/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( presentation board powerpoint )

At work today, I was composing some poetry on an extra napkin. Deal with it. Because my coworker couldn't. He stole the napkin from me and read it aloud to the entire staff. My poem was about a boy I had a crush on. So much for that. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/20/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( poetry napkin jerk )

At work today, a motivational speaker came to my summer school class. It's a great break for me. But I don't think he was screened very well- this guy cursed nonstop. And I work at an elementary school. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/20/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( motivational speaker cursing summer school )

At work today, we were reviewing Supreme Court cases in order to prepare a summary about Sotomayor. Summer is so fun! I told my mom what I was doing and she clapped. "I love the Supremes!" she said. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/20/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (0) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( lawyer supreme court sotomayor )

At work today, I kept getting looks from my coworker Creepy McCreeperson. That's my name for him. He wasn't supposed to be scheduled today, but I found out from a coworker that he rescheduled his shift to work next to me. I think he skipped school for it too. I'm dumbemployed.

by sumo_momo on 09/20/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( creep rescheduled shift )
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