officemonkey | Voted

At work today, I told my supervisor I had a bad back and couldn't do much physical labor. Where did she schedule me for all week? Warehouse. Awesome. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I walked in to see some furniture reconfigured. I originally picked out my cube because it has a small glimpse of the outside world through the conference room window. Thanks boss, the new file cabinet is equally soothing. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I called my boss to ask when and where I could meet him to get my check since it's Friday, I needed the cash, and he was apparently "Working from home." He pauses a moment, then responds "What check?" Um, construction project engineer is NOT a volunteer job, sir. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I was on the phone to set up phone service for our jobsite trailers and for our main office. I was talking for a good 15 minutes detailing our needs. I hung up and my boss, sitting next to me, tells me we don't need phones in the trailers. Little slow there, bud? I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, after a long time I finished the 50 villa drawings I had to submit. When I showed them to my boss, he said, "Good work, we work as a great team." Thanks for sharing the credit, boss. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, as a gimmick, I had an image of the "Blue Screen of Death" as my desktop background. As my computer started up, my boss saw it and freaked out, thinking it was the real deal and, in his panic, yanked the power cord out of the computer, damaging the power source. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I was called up and told to show an electrician around 3 of our potential job trailer locations. Right after, I got another call to go pick up plans from City Hall, 35 miles away. When I was done with everything, I called my boss, and he answered with "What now?!" I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I decided to go home a little early because I had spent the previous 6 hours alone at the office surfing the internet. As I'm waiting for the elevator, my project manager shows up with an excited "Oh good, you're still here. I need your help right away". I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I attached receipts for office items I purchased using my personal funds to my timecard to be reimbursed for it (around $120), as they explained in the company policy. My check didn't include the reimbursement. I shouldn't be surprised- they haven't any other time. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, my boss took me aside to inform me of a STRICT policy he was going to begin enforcing, requiring me to be in the office by 8am sharp (mind you, I have a 40 mile commute). He hasn't shown up before 9:30 for the past couple months (mind you, he has a 5 mile commute). I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, my boss called me to tell me from now on I had to be in the office at 8 AM because a new project engineer was going to move into our office. I don't know why it would matter, since it's now noon and my boss hasn't shown up yet. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I have to read through 3 volumes of project specifications (each is between 400-500 pages long) to "look for and note anything of interest to us", which is code for "we have nothing for you to do, but don't want to let you have a day off". I'm dumbemployed