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Weird Shift

At work today, I thought I'd play Elvis Presley over the store intercom. The sad thing is that it went on for twenty minutes before I got caught. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/28/18 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( elvis presley store intercom )

At work today, I was checking coats at the club. Someone checked their coat- and a small dog was in the pocket. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/27/18 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( coats checking dog )

At work today, I stood around all day folding sweaters. That's normal for me. But isn't it sad when you have to mess up the sweaters just to have something to do? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/26/18 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( sweater folding mess )

At work today, I was having a normal shift as a dental hygienist. Then a patient asked for a volunteer fluoride treatment. "Please," he said. "It's a fetish." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/24/18 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( dental hygienist fluoride )

At work today, nobody came in the corner store where I work. I killed time by playing videogames. I realized only four minutes later that a customer was waiting at the counter to pay. I still finished the level. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/23/18 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( corner store videogames level )

At work today, I got a tiny cut. Store procedure dictates I get the emergency health kit, file a report, and note it on my time sheet. I healed before it was all over. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/23/18 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( cut blood paperwork )

At work today, I rescheduled myself for Saturday mornings. I drink heavily Friday nights. I'm hoping my hangover will make me forget I have a job. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/22/18 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( saturday drinking hangover )

At work today, I watched as a customer toasted his future son in law. He shattered the glass. That can't be good luck. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/20/18 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( son in law toast shattered )

At work today, I called the janitor to clean an overflowing toilet. Instead of cleaning, he accused me of not eating enough fiber. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/19/18 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( toilet overflowing cleaning )

At work today, I brought my cat with me to work. I guess that's a no-no. It ended up ripping up the entire office's carpet. Good thing no one else was around to see it. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/18/18 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( cat carpet tearing )

At work today, I recorded the radio songs played at my work. Is it really fair that I heard "Ob La Di Ob La Da" seven times during my shift? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/17/18 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( beatles radio playlist )

At work today, the bar dog started spazzing out. We couldn't tell why until we tested its breath- who gives a dog tequila? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/16/18 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( bar dog tequila )
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