At work today, my boss was all in a flurry about a VIP breakfast at 8AM. He told me to make a fruit tray for about 20 people. I made it and wrapped it up. Hours later I go into the cooler and it's still there. I ask him why. He said he forgot it. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, my coworker told me his personal plan for beating the recession. He is going to save all of his 20 oz. soda bottles and refill them with 2 liters. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, after throwing out a thief who tried to get a refund on defective merchandise that they admitted not paying for, the corporate office called and wrote me up for treating a "customer" so poorly. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I had someone try to return a defective item without a receipt. After explaining that I could not find where she had paid for the item in the last 9 months, she yelled back and said "It's not my fault you people didn't catch me!" I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, everyone in my department took today off except for me. Every single one. Not one of them thought to mention it to me and I have to cover for all of them. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today at the bank, a customer kept hitting the buzzer at the drive thru window. I finished waiting on another customer (during the constant buzzing) and walked over to the drive thru to find a priest. "Thank you for your patience, Father." I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, a former guest called upset because her refund was $4.32 less than she expected. She caused such a fuss, she's getting 50% off her next stay. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I conducted training on stress management and visualizations for relaxation. I seated the hearing impaired up front so they could read my lips. At the end of the session, they said it was hard to follow the visualization when I asked them to close their eyes. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, they held a meeting to get ideas on what kind of questions to include in an employee survey. So I just asked, "How in the world did we get all the way to the decision to have a survey and no one has asked for our input?" I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, I notified a user she had a virus on her computer. She wondered if that was why there was a big red x through her anti-virus icon. She had thought about mentioning it when she noticed it the other day...I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, my USB adapted mouse for my laptop broke. I'm used to it, but I used the touch pad. By the end of the day, I had the nerdiest callous on my index finger that any man has ever had. I'm dumbemployed.

At work today, my wife and I were trying to improve our small resale business with new window treatments. Apparently, nobody told her how well tape measure works. We made three trips back to the store. I'm dumbemployed.